羞怯阻碍您的进步 2008-7-29 Shy hinders your progress

羞怯是一种逃避行为的最常见形式，其表现是多种多样的。在日常生活中，常常会看到这样的现象：有的人在路上碰到熟人因怕羞故意躲避;有的人不敢在大庭广众之下讲话，一讲就会脸红舌硬。上述情况在心理学上称为怕羞心理。

Shyness is one of the most common forms of evading behavior, and its manifestations are varied. In daily life, it is often seen that some people encounter acquaintances on the road because of shyness; Some people do not dare to speak in public, a speech will be hard. The above situation is psychologically called shyness.

怕羞心理的形成与儿童时期缺乏父母的抚爱或很少与外界环境接触有关。这类人的性格大多内向，气质属于粘液质型、抑郁质型或两种类型的混合型，神经系统较脆弱，女性多于男性。怕羞心理产生的原因，除了与人的气质特点有关外，主要是环境和教育的作用。例如，有成绩时得不到奖励，而无成绩时受到惩罚的男孩是最羞怯的;

The formation of shyness is related to the lack of parental affection or little contact with the outside environment during childhood. Most of these people's personalities are introverted. The temperament is mucous, depressive, or two types of mixed types. The nervous system is more fragile and women are more than men. In addition to the characteristics of human temperament, the cause of shyness is mainly the role of environment and education. For example, boys who are not rewarded for success and punished for failure are the most shy;

如果父母在社交上是积极的，则他们的孩子大多不会羞怯，这就说明了家庭环境的作用。

If parents are socially active, most of their children are not shy, which suggests the role of the family environment.

在日常生活中过分怕羞有碍于工作、学习和人际交往。这是因为有怕羞心理的人过多地约束和拘谨自己，而难与人建立亲密的关系;因沮丧、焦虑和孤独则导致性格上的软弱和冷漠;因怕羞而怯懦、胆小和意志薄弱。怕羞心理随着年龄的增长和交往的增多，可以逐渐减轻。如果到了婚恋年龄还怕见生人，不敢与人接触和交往，这就变成一种病态心理了。如何克服怕羞心理呢?

Too much shyness in daily life is an obstacle to work, study and interpersonal communication. This is because shy people too much restraint and self-restraint, and it is difficult to establish a close relationship with people; Frustration, anxiety, and loneliness lead to weakness and indifference in the character; Coward, timid, and weak will because of shyness. With the increase of age and interaction, shyness can be gradually reduced. If the age of marriage and love is still afraid to see strangers, do not dare to contact and associate with people, this becomes a pathological psychology. How to overcome shyness?

要有自信心　英国哲学家黑格尔说过：“人应尊重自己，并应自视能配得上最高尚的东西”。对于怕羞的人来说，千万不要为自己的短处而紧张，恰恰相反，应经常想到自己的长处，要深信：“天生我材必有用”。要培养自信心，相信只要兴致勃勃地干，自己的能力必定能发挥出来。

Have Confidence The British philosopher Hegel said: "Man should respect himself and should regard himself as worthy of the noblest things." For shy people, do not be nervous about their own weaknesses. On the contrary, they should often think of their own strengths. They should be convinced that: "Natural talent will be useful." To develop self-confidence, believe that as long as the spirit of work, their own ability will be able to play out.

不要害怕别人的议论　仔细分析那些怕在大庭广众中讲话，羞于与人打交道的人，便不难发现，他们最怕别人否定的评价。这样越怕越羞，越羞越怕，形成恶性循环。其实，“哪个人后无人说”，被人评论是正常的事，不必过分看重。有时，否定的评价还有可能成为激励自己的动力呢。

Don't be afraid of other people's comments carefully analyze those who are afraid to speak in public and shy of dealing with people. It is not difficult to find that they are most afraid of other people's negative comments. The more shy, the more shy, the more afraid, forming a vicious circle. In fact, "who has no one to say after", it is normal for people to be commented on and do not value it too much. Sometimes negative evaluations can be a motivator.

讲究锻炼方法　开始可以先在熟人范围里多发言，然后在熟人多、生人少的范围内练习，再发展到生人多、熟人少的场合，循序渐进，逐步增加对羞怯的心理抗力。每到一个新场合之前，事先作好充分准备，增强信心，提高勇气。

Pay attention to the exercise method can start by speaking more in the area of acquaintances, and then practice in the area of more acquaintances and fewer strangers, and then develop into situations where there are more strangers and fewer acquaintances, step by step, gradually increasing the psychological resistance to shyness. Before each new occasion, prepare well in advance, strengthen confidence and strengthen courage.

学会自我暗示法　每到陌生场合自感紧张时，可用暗示法镇静情绪，例如把生人当熟人一样看待，怕羞心理就能减少大半。当怕羞者在陌生场合勇敢地讲出第一句话之后，随之而来的很可能就是流利的语言了。用自我暗示法突破起初的阻力，是克服羞怯的一种有效措施。

Learn Self-hinting Every time you feel nervous in an unfamiliar situation, you can use hinting to calm your emotions, such as treating strangers as acquaintances, and shyness can be reduced by more than half. When a shy person courageously speaks the first sentence in a strange situation, it is likely that the following is a fluent language. Using self-suggestion to break through the initial resistance is an effective measure to overcome shyness.

只要你敢于对怕羞说“不怕”，并敢于在实践中克服它，就会走出羞怯的低谷，成为落落大方的人。

If you dare to say "not afraid" to shyness and dare to overcome it in practice, you will walk out of the valley of shyness and become a generous person.